Pornography Use and Addiction

In my office I make no judgement about the use of pornography. The effects of pornography use vary greatly and is best evaluated on an individual basis. Many people have the ability to view porn while maintaining their personal integrity. For others, porn becomes a way to escape from negative emotions or boredom. Some substitute masturbation for personal intimate relationships and connection.

What makes pornography and/or masturbation dependence easy to form are the three A’s: anonymity, accessibility, and affordability. There is an endless cascade of sexual fantasy and intensity available online. Portable streaming devices allow discreet access 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

It is no surprise that habitual porn use is such a compelling anesthetizer. Over time, uncomfortable feelings like shame, fear, anxiety, loneliness, or sadness become sexualized. When there is even a hint of an intolerable emotion it triggers a craving for sexual arousal. The brain becomes dependent upon the release of dopamine and endorphins to soothe the emotional discomfort. Upon this release, there is often a flood of shame that eventually reignites the cravings. This quick-fix loop is the underlying cycle of pornography addiction.

The question I get asked most often is, “When does pornography use cross over to addiction?” Simply put, it is when the individual has lost the choice over whether or not to engage in porn despite the negative impact on his or her life. Regardless of the shame or self-condemnation that often follows acting out, a person sees no other way of coping and excuses the behavior regardless of the consequences. Some of these repercussions include arguments and tension within the primary relationship, inability or lack of desire to perform sexually with a partner, decreased productivity at work or in school, financial loss, and emotional or physical illness.

Excessive pornography use and addiction can be successfully treated in therapy. It is possible to regain emotional and physical intimacy, self-worth, and freedom. It is important to find a therapist who has specialized training in this area. General addiction therapists may not have specific clinical knowledge required to treat porn and cybersex-related behaviors.